Congratulations! You've signed up for a disc golf tournament in the middle of the Belize jungle. Either you're incredibly adventurous or you've made a terrible mistake.

Either way, we're here to help you survive with your dignity (mostly) intact.

DISC GOLF VOCABULARY 101

• DON'T SAY: "I threw my frisbee into the trees!" DO SAY: "My disc found an unintended arboreal obstacle."

• DON'T SAY: "I got a hole-in-one!" DO SAY: "I aced it!" (Then try not to cry with joy.)

• DON'T SAY: "This is just like ultimate frisbee!" DO SAY: Nothing. Just smile and nod when the veteran players start talking about "hyzer angles" and "anhyzer release."

Other Essential Terms:

• Chains: The metal contraption you're aiming for (not a fashion accessory)

• Fairway: The theoretical path your disc should take (emphasis on "theoretical")

• Rough: Where your disc will actually go

• OB (Out of Bounds): Fancy term for "Ou gaye bagay yo"

• Mulligan: What you desperately want but probably won't get

THE THREE TYPES OF DISCS

• DRIVER: For throwing far and looking impressive until it disappears into the jungle canopy. Think of it as your ego in plastic form.

• MIDRANGE: The reliable middle child of discs. Does what it's supposed to do without drama. You'll actually use this one.

• PUTTER: For close shots and making you feel like you know what you're doing. Spoiler alert: you don't, but that's okay.

Pro Tip: Bring extras. The Belize jungle is hungry and your discs look delicious.

BASIC THROWING TECHNIQUES

• Grip: Hold the disc like you're shaking hands with it. Firm but friendly.

• Stance: Stand sideways to your target. Yes, it feels weird. Do it anyway.

• Backswing: Pull the disc across your body like you're starting a lawn mower (a very gentle, disc-golf-specific lawn mower).

• Release: Let go when your arm is pointing at the target. Revolutionary concept, we know.

• Follow Through: Continue the motion like you're reaching for that last piece of pizza.

• Watch: As your disc does everything except what you intended.

COURSE ETIQUETTE

• Wait your turn: Just like kindergarten, but with more trees

• Keep up: Nobody wants to wait for you to find your disc in that bush

• Yell "FORE!" when your disc is heading toward people (or jaguars)

• Don't give unsolicited advice: Save the coaching for after your third beer

• Help look for lost discs: Because karma is real, and you'll need help finding yours later

SURVIVING THE JUNGLE COURSE

Wildlife Encounters:

• If a howler monkey steals your disc, let it go.

• Iguanas make terrible caddies but excellent spectators.

• That rustling in the bushes is probably just your disc. Probably.

Weather Considerations:

• Humidity will make you sweat like you're in a sauna. You are basically in a sauna.

• Rain makes everything slippery, including your grip on reality.

• Bring water. Lots of water. And maybe a backup liver.

Navigation Tips:

• Stick to the trails. Getting lost in the jungle is not part of the tournament format.

• Follow the experienced players. They know where they're going. Usually.

• If you hear chainsaws, you've gone too far. (That's the grounds crew, not part of the game.)

SCORING:

• Par: What good players shoot (ignore this number)

• Bogey: What average players shoot (your new best friend)

• Double Bogey: What you'll probably shoot (and that's fine!)

• "I'm not keeping score": What you'll say by hole 6

Remember: The person with the lowest score wins, just like golf. But unlike golf, you can't blame your caddie because you don't have one.

FINAL WORDS OF WISDOM

Disc golf is 10% skill, 20% luck, and 70% pretending you meant to do that. Everyone started as a beginner, even that person who just threw their disc 400 feet through a gap you can barely see.

Most importantly, you're playing disc golf in paradise while supporting a great cause. If you can't have fun throwing plastic in the Belize jungle, you might need to check your pulse.

Now get out there and show those trees who's boss!